Monday, April 13, 2009

When Life Offers Options

I am choosing my next career move, and it's a difficult choice. The options vary, almost to extremes. The future bright in three directions, but I can only chose one at this fork in the road. 

Moments of clarity come into focus only briefly, giving way to ripples on the pond.  My reflection - for a moment clear - is muddled once again as new information plops into the pool of my consciousness.   I research and yet more information comes.  Housing markets. Unemployment stats. Average incomes. Foreclosure rates.  

Better to live where there are fewer foreclosures and it's cheaper to pay the bills?  Or is it better to live where there are more opportunities... even if everyone else is losing their job and their home?

So many lives revolve around mine and any choice I make will effect them as well.  How many decades do I wait to make a selfish choice?  Will I ever?  How tightly do I hold my children? How far do I go... when I let go?

Proving myself and my power to earn versus enjoying the moments we have while we have them.  Should you always take the higher risk/ bigger payoff... or is there a time to bet safely and value health and quality of day-to-day life over trips to Italy.  Maybe big expensive vacations are for those who don't have enough peace and enjoyment at home.  For those who work so hard to get away, maybe only a cruise or an island can save them from the stress of their daily lives.  Maybe a different lifestyle would be like a permanent vacation.

Decisions are not like chess moves.  You don't lose.  You shift and adjust and move on.  What life do I want in five years?  Where do I picture that and with whom and doing what?  Is there a settling or a mobilizing?  Is there one refuge or many adventures on the road?  Who will accompany me?  Or will I accompany them?

Sweet life—holder of memories, present joys and sorrows, and future hopes and dreams—where will you bring me if I decide this or choose that?  I must weigh options, desires, desirable outcomes, scenarios, worst and best cases, and conclude with a decision.  

Change is one of life's greatest challenges, greatest gifts, and greatest mysteries.  As I move toward my next change I am fully aware that my life will never be the same, and in awe that I actually have a say in the matter.

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